Flying with small children is stressful for everyone. Before I had children I used to think, "Great, there's a baby on this flight. I hope my seat is not near them." Then sure enough, they were seated close enough to me to keep me awake for the duration of the flight. I used to think, "Can't those parents get their kid to stop crying?" Then I had kids, and my perspective changed.
Both of our children have flown, and I approached each trip with much anxiety. My son's first plane trip was to my brother-in-law's wedding. My son was 2 months old. He did fine on both legs, and did not cry on the plane. I will not take credit for that. I did have to breast feed him on the plane, which was challenging, as my son did not like having a blanket on his head. To top it off (pardon the pun), I had leaked through my shirt and arrived at the rehearsal dinner with a shawl over my right breast just to cover up the stain. Anyhow, I digress. My son flew on planes quite a bit when he was a baby. When he was 9 months old I took him by myself to visit my parents. He cried the whole time. The other passengers were clearly disturbed, but my main concern was trying to figure out why he was upset. I never did figure it out. I walked around, I rocked him, I fed him, I changed him -all to no avail. At the end of flight, I got dirty looks, while the guy in front of me got pats on the back for sympathy. I truly felt bad for the other passengers, but I thought to myself, "Doesn't anyone feel bad for me or my baby?"
For my daughter's first flight, she was 2 months old and my son was 3 years old. My aunt was kind enough to travel with us, as my husband was on a business trip, and an old friend was getting married. The kids both did fine. Again, I take no credit, and attribute it to good fortune. I try to recall the details of this trip, since my daughter is now 3, the same age my son had been for that last plane trip. The kids haven't been on a plane since then.
With the few trips we have taken with the kids, I can't recall much that we did to keep the kids from acting up. As I said, we just got lucky. But I do plan to take some action to hopefully smooth out our trip:
1- THAT'S ENTERTAINMENT: Bring lots of options for playtime -crayons, paper, coloring books, videos, puzzles, games, cards. Have at least 3 or 4 options, but don't bring them all out at one time. Play your cards right, so to speak. Milk each one for all it's got, then move on to the next one. Keep in mind, you and the kids are confined to a small space. Try not to bring things that can be messy or cumbersome (markers, Play Doh, glue, games with small pieces).2- FOOD, GLORIOUS FOOD: Hungry children are unhappy children. Keep your children well fed, but not so full that they become sick to their stomachs. Feed them beforehand. Have snacks available. Again, have a variety of snacks, but do not introduce them all at once. As wrong as this sounds, snacktime provides some entertainment value as well. Again, try to avoid snacks that can become messy (juice boxes, anything sticky, make your own pizzas, taco bar :)
3- CAN CAN: Make sure you change diapers and/or go to the bathroom as immediately prior to boarding as possible. Airplane restrooms are small, and few have diaper changing stations. Children have a hard time using those toilets. And while you may be able to change a wet diaper at your passenger's seat, changing (or worse, not changing) a #2 diaper may earn you some dirty looks and nasty comments from the other passengers.
4- CAT NAP: If possible try to get your children to nap on the trip. If your trip coincides with their regular naptime, all the better. If you try to postpone their nap until flight time, they may sleep the entire flight. However, if you postpone the nap too long, you may find yourself carrying a cranky child onto the plane. Sometimes, it's just luck.
5- SIBLING RIVALRY: If you have more than one child, try to keep them separated (this works at church, too!). If this is not possible (ie, there is only one of you , and 2, 3, or 4 kids), pack one of each item for each of them (see Numbers 1 and 2). The most common argument my kids have is arguing over things that we have only one of, no matter how small or trivial. Some actual examples of such items that my kids fight over at home: random scrap of paper with my name on it, a paper bookmark from the local library, inflatable ball from birthday party goodie bag, plastic 2 -inch frog, old birthday card, reflex hammer from pharmaceutical company, etc. The reason they fight? There is only one of each. Try to avoid this on the trip -pack two of each of everything.
6- CAN WE TALK?: If your children are old enough, talk to them. Lay out your expectations, and let them know what is and isn't acceptable behavior on the plane beforehand. I have found that this works for whenever I take the kids to the store or to a party or the playground. I have also found that if I forget to talk with the kids beforehand, they are harder to deal with. For example, I like to remind them ahead of time that when we say that it is time to go home (from the playground, for example), then it is time to go home, no protests allowed. They are pretty good about going home after I have said this. If I forget to remind them beforehand, they are much harder to drag out of the playground. Before our trip, I may say, "When we get on the plane, we must stay in our seats with our seatbelts on . . . so that we can stay safe, " etc, etc. My kids don't understand everything I explain to them, but they seem to appreciate being kept in the loop.
(Entertaining aside: That reminds me of one of the anesthesiology attendings at the Children's Hospital. Just as we were getting ready to sleep our patients, he would ask him/her if he/she had heard of the oxygen-hemoglobin dissociation curve. Some children nodded and listened intently as he proceeded to explain that acidity, increased temperature, and 2,3 DPG would shift the curve to the right. They calmly drifted off to sleep within seconds).
These are the things I plan on keeping in mind for our trip to my cousin's wedding. Any other suggestions out there? Anyway, that's the plan. And yes, I know about best laid plans . . .
I'm not sure with whom to side in this case. I sympathize with the passengers. No body wants to hear a screaming toddler for 2 hours. But that does include the parents. The parents are probably the ones who least want to hear the children cry, especially on a plane. I would like to think that most parents do their best to console the kids, but sometimes it is oh so difficult to calm a child down. I got the impression that some people thought that the parents on the AirTrans flight were not trying hard enough to get their child to sit in her seat. The parents stated that they were not given sufficient time to calm their child, and convince her to sit in her seat. The airline seemed to put emphasis on the fact that the child refused to remain seated with her seat belt for take off, and that it would have been against Federal Regulations. I think that's probably all b*llsh*t. Everybody seems to leave out the very basic fact that NOBODY WANTED TO HEAR THE CHILD SCREAMING. That includes the parents, the flightcrew and the other passengers. The flight crew was insisting on having the child in the seat with the seatbelt on. If the parents had physically forced the child to do so, the flight would have left closer to schedule, the rules would have been followed, but the kid would have screamed. A lot. So phooey to AirTran for hiding behind "Federal Regulations." And phooey to the parents for not calling them on it, and perhaps insist that the child stay seated for take-off, instead of trying to talk her into it. As for the rest of the passengers, I hope they had a quiet flight. Maybe airlines can offer child-free flights for those who expect to actually sleep, work, or nurse their hangovers on the plane.
